Dear 2019,
You were a doozy. Goodness gracious sakes alive. What a ride! You pushed me to my limits in just about every way possible – and when I thought I would break, you showed me grace. I’m not who I was last year this time and isn’t that a blessing. I grew into a braver, stronger, and more resilient person and it wouldn’t have been so without every one of the lessons below.
Here are some of the more serious lessons learned from 2019:
2019, you taught me that my body can do wild things. When I decided to run a half marathon, I didn’t know if I could run a mile. In 5 months, I went from 0 miles to 13.1 not once, not twice, but THREE TIMES IN TWO MONTHS. Running three half marathons in two months is not something I was built for. I was built for eating chicken nuggets. But seeing my body meet the weekly challenges I set was an incredible high. I felt so capable. And when I got rhabdo from one of those half marathons, I learned that my stubborn drive will push me even further than my body can. It helped me to fully embrace my incredible willpower and refusal to give up that has helped me overcome obstacles and prove my doubts wrong. And also, it reminded me to hydrate. Yikes.
2019, you taught me that community is so dang important. If I’m honest, I spent most of the year feeling lonely. It wasn’t until late in the year that I took a risk and reached out to some old friends. Reconnecting reminded me the power of belonging (wussup Brene Brown). It’s so life-giving to find people who get you – the people who feel like home. 2019, I’m hoping this was just an appetizer into what 2020 will bring.
2019, you taught me that home is a sacred place for me. I feel most rested, most at peace, and most happy when I can create beautiful, cozy spaces to live in. I’m a homebody through and through, and this year really emphasized how important it is for me to make home my sanctuary. I renovated rooms, I purged items I didn’t need, I invested in home projects, and I enjoyed more than anything making my house a home. Home is my love language.
And some of the more ridiculous lessons learned:
Don’t fall in love with your plumber and then pay $850 for a pipe HE BROKE HIMSELF just because he’s the most handsome man you’ve ever seen. While you think it’s a good idea, he will text you a month later and say, “how do you know I’m not following you?” and you will have to tell your neighbor, Dirty Red, to look out for you.
If you don’t get 8-10 hours of sleep every night, the exorbitant amount of caffeine you drink on your way to work will get you so hyped up that you’ll sign up to run the Chicago Marathon when you can barely climb the stairs without losing your breath. Don’t do that again.
Keep seeing the therapist that looks like Matthew McConaughey because he is a brain wizard and an insanely talented life coach and makes you a better person. He also loves Dolly Parton and thinks you’re funny and that’s beautiful.
Don’t date divorced men. They. Are. Not. Ready. You will, however, disregard this notion and go out on dates with THREE DIFFERENT DIVORCED MEN WHO EACH HAVE TWO KIDS. Stop. Just don’t do it. Even if their kids have a secret handshake with you and you make alien cookies with them at Christmas. No. You can make alien cookies by yourself.
Speaking of dating, if you go on a date with a man and it goes really well, but as you’re getting in your car, he yells, “BYE PENPAL!” at the back of your head, just get in your car and drive. 4,000 miles away from him. Fast. Because you won’t do it and then you’ll go out on more dates and in the end, he will tell you that he just “wants to be in-person pen pals” and WILL NEVER EVEN WRITE YOU A SINGLE LETTER EVEN THOUGH YOU SEE HIM EVERY WEEK AT RUN CLUB. Also, don’t get jealous when he brings a new hott thang to run club. You’ll almost cry and want to leave because THE AUDACITY but you’ll find out later that it’s his cousin. Oops?
In October, look closely before waving at neighbors out in their yard because you might be waving at a Halloween decoration that looks like a ghost.
Speaking of ghosts, if a man ghosts you, don’t search for his obituary. He’s alive, just an asshole.
Don’t decorate your porch with a cute little pile of pine cones beside your lanterns to give it a trendy, earthy feel. Your yard man will think they’re trash and repeatedly get rid of them. He doesn’t get your style.
Lastly, don’t show up dressed up as measles for a Halloween bar crawl. It’s funny that you have red stickers in your pocket to infect strangers at the bar, but this is a costume for an extroverted person. You like hiding under your weighted blanket. I applaud your creativity, but when everyone else is dressed up as sexy cats and scandalous flapper girls and YOU ARE A VERY CONTROVERSIAL DEADLY DISEASE, you will want to go right back home.
2019, you were nuts. My prayer is that 2020 brings deeper friendships, health to all of my loved ones, success in building a brand that I love, and growth – in my talents, in my compassion, in my faith. Let it be true that I stop saying yes out of guilt, that I spend time with folks that remind me that I’m not hard to love (and vice versa!), and more ordinary moments where I feel at home in wherever I am. Amen, y’all.
Friends, I hope 2020 brings you the very things your heart craves, humor to carry you through the darkest of times, and a deeper and richer understanding of what love is.
We’re in this thing together and I’m so glad.
XOXO,
Katherine